Emotions and Suffering – Sona Kakar

Emotional Suffering by Sona Kakar

How do I take care of my Emotions? 

When we talk of emotions ,different words pop up in our mind . Though we all want our emotions to be understood by our partners it is strange that when asked to identify which emotion we are talking about,a lot of us struggle with different words. Words like hurt, pain, trauma, lack of validation, helplessness  etc may come up.

What are emotions ?

However, emotions are feelings we experience when some interaction takes place with other beings.

For example, if one meets a long lost good friend , we experience happiness, when we lose someone we experience sadness,if someone says hurtful things we experience anger. Yet identifying emotions in reality can sometimes become a problem.

Is helplessness an emotion?

Lets say a young girl gets back from her college . Her mother expected her sooner and shouts at her.The girl feels angry at her mother,but unable to express her anger at her mother fearing she will make her mother unhappy,she turns the anger onto herself and becomes helpless and unhappy.

Why does one have trouble in closer bonds?

Here in any other situation ,if a stranger had shouted at her ,she would have responded angrily, but with her mother who she loves a lot ,the experience of anger gets covered with sadness and guilt.

What are mixed feelings?

Feelings are never one kind. We experience all sorts of emotions towards the same people.After all we love certain people but the same people may also cause us to experience anger.Relationships after all either deliver delay or disappoint and we may experience a host of feelings towards the same person.

How then might this girl take care of her emotions? Which emotion needs her attention and how can she overcome her sadness?

In What kind of therapy will focus on emotions ?

In dynamic therapy the focus will be in experiencing repressed feelings without hurting yourself or suffering from neurotic guilt.

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